my chest hurts. it feels like a heavy cloth of meaningless realisations have engulfed my heart, suffocating it, securing all crevices from any openings for oxygen. it is hazy. the feeling tightens longer than i can remember it has ever has and i wonder how i am this way have i ever been like this but mostly why. why does my heart constrict. as it ebbs away, it is immediately followed by the rush of adrenaline that pumps my heart fast. too fast. like it's relishing the idea of living. almost as if the cloak has been untied from its nearly severed neck. almost as if it is beating for something.
it does. i know. so i let it beat.
♥ 5:30 PM