I think I might've detransitionized myself by reverting back to my rude rude self. I don't need to be a prude, but I sure do have to keep myself in check.

Everyone is taking their personal time off to execute these activities, the whole event, so don't think you are alone in this. Never think that you are sacrificing yourself. This is work for Allah SWT.

Don't say anything when you have nothing good to say. It is enough that He knows your pain and worries, InsyaAllah He will ease your difficulties. Be at peace no matter the circumstance, for it will be looked back upon as one of your greatest achievements.

Give yourself time to reflect, and only then you react. Respond with this in mind, "What would the Prophet (PBUH) do?" Look at him for examples, learn about him to strengthen your admiration for the Greatest Man Ever Lived, and do your best to emulate his Sunnah.

You can do this, baby.

Huge reminder from Allah SWT and His Mercy. Ya Allah, thank you for this chance to repent and remorse.

More growing up to do. As daunting as it is, Allah SWT will always be holding your hand at every step that you take.

As you have once preached and believed in, trust in His judgement and His trials. Trust in His promise.