I walked out of the dining hall, hunger satiated. Knowing that I was enjoying a momentary break from exerting my brains to study made my steps feel light Alhamdulillah, praise to Allah for rewarding me with a meal so filling. My heart felt fuzzy, like someone patted my back on a job well done. At that moment, my eyes chanced upon the sky. A deep hue of orange with soft tinges of yellow emblazoned the sky. It was as if someone had swept me away to a solaced world where nothing should be of any worry. I was awashed with contentment and appreciation, feelings that I truly felt for the very first time. As i stood there, gawking at the beauty of Allah's creations, all my efforts towards my studies and my ibadah came rushing to me like a torrent of unencumbered water. It is worth my time, i thought to myself, and worth my energy. I truly believed in Allah and His rewards. I was blessed.
I want to capture this feeling again, but my idleness and lacklustre aims in life have entrapped me in this huge blob of dispirited cocoon. To break free, it is a task i've attempted before, but have been sidestepped by the alluring whispers of the devil. Determined as I may had been, presently, I am hopeless.
I might've become someone I don't respect.
